Advice From God

Dear God,

Where did you go? I came to Advice From God earlier today, and found nothing but a blank screen of blue. Now I see that this divine advice column has changed, adopting a new look.

My religious faith is rocked to the core. I thought that you were supposed to be eternal, and unchanging, God. How could you have gone away? How could you have changed your look?

- Louie

Louie,

I may be eternal, but I am also omnipotent.

If I don’t have the power to update my look, then I am not omnipotent. If I don’t have the power to go away for a while and no longer exist, then I am not omnipotent.

Also, you need to reconsider your idea that I am just one thing. After all, if I don’t have the power to be two-faced, then I am not omnipotent.

Expand your mind, Louie. Also, try to have some patience as I get all the Advice From God features back up. Creation of the Earth took me eight days, after all…

… and just wait until I tell you about that eighth day.

- God