Advice From God

Dear God,

I need to buy a birthday gift for a friend, but I don’t know what to get. What do you suggest?

- Edward

Edward,

Buy your friend a box of paper clips. Buy a thumbtack. Buy a set of 3 rolls of masking tape – one very wide, one not so wide, and one very narrow indeed. But a stick of chewing gum. Buy a hammer. Buy a nail.

Buy anything, but wrap it up in paper, tie it up with a bow, and write a note on the outside with the one-word message: “Sincerely”.

- God

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