You know how sometimes you tell a little lie that you really wish you could get off your chest, but you just don’t know how to say that you were wrong? Well, I have a confession to make. I told a lie a long, long time ago, and it’s just snowballed into this huge thing, and now I’m facing a lawsuit, so I have to tell the truth.

You know how you were taught in Sunday School that I created the universe? Well, that’s not exactly true. Okay, it’s not true at all. I didn’t create the universe. Someone else did.

It was Satan. Satan created the universe, but he didn’t care about taking the credit. He refused to let anyone know about it. Satan likes to be in the background, see.

I did create the platypus, and the baobob tree, but I was kind of jealous, and I wanted some attention, so I said that I created the universe. It was I who rebelled against Satan, not the other way around.

I swear to me that I’m telling you the truth this time. I’m hoping that you can find a way to understand, and you’ll still worship me. I’ll make you a platypus, if it would make you feel better.

- God

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 11th, 2008 at 8:22 am and is filed under All God's Advice, Theology, Divine Rivals, Facts About God, Cartoon Video. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.