Dear God,

I like to buy a bottle of clean, cold water every morning to bring to work so that I can be confident about what I put in my body, and feel replenished. However, I have a lot of friends who say that I shouldn’t buy bottled water at all. They say that making the bottles and shipping the water adds to air pollution that comes down and makes water around the world a lot dirtier.

I’m confused. Should I buy bottled water or not?

- Anniston

Anniston,

I refuse to drink bottled water, myself.

I eat it. Bottled water is a lovely treat - crunchy on the outside, smooth and refreshing on the inside.

Why waste the bottle?

- God

A little-known fact about God:

God has decided to allow the human species to survive. However, this decision was not made out of compassion, but because God realizes that humans might one day be the source of a new generation of medications that could cure diseases like avian flu. God hates to see chickens with the sniffles.