Should I Vote For Mitt Romney?
Tuesday, July 17th, 2007Dear God,
Should I vote for Mitt Romney? He seems like a God-fearing man.
- Pattie
Pattie,
No, you should not vote for Mitt Romney, and no, he is not a God-fearing man.
In fact, Mitt Romney is a God-nagging man. He keeps on complaining that I have too much sex and violence in the Bible, and he’s afraid of what will happen to America’s children if they’re exposed to the Bible too much.
Mitt prays to me about this every night, so I never get the time I’ve been hoping for to hang those new stars I got last year from Neiman Marcus. Sometimes, Mr. Romney, when you pray, the answer is no.
My advice to people like Mitt Romney is that, if you don’t want your children to be exposed to sex and violence, then just turn off the Bible. You’re the parent, after all.
- God